Nairobi Billboards


Nairobi is billboard city, they are all over and some are huge. The advertising companies are making money by polluting the city with posters which no one reads. And the one reading them cannot afford the product advertised, so who cares!
It gives egos to the clients and hides constructions sites.

Most women on billboards are light-skinned, if not, they don’t look too Kenyan. To look too Kenyan on billboards is not good unless you advertise for banks and insurance companies. Yep, some do show the people they rip off.
The female models are light. Just like greed being lighter must be gooood! They have long hair, smooth light skin and a stainless teeth smile. They’re slim with no big butt.

The men look good too with Johnny Bravo’s type bodies shaped by gym machines. Because, bodies emaciated by hunger require too much retouching. Publicists want you to believe that you’re healthy even on a meal-a-day. Don’t have too much facial bumps or ingrown hair either, it’s un-African. Their skin is so smooooth!

White Kenyan cow-boys and girls, lets not forget the Indian, need not to apply for modeling jobs. Your hair too good and you too white for that market. Natural look is bad but lightening cream is gooood! Furthermore you don’t buy wig so you no good for the economy.

By now, you know that lots of ads in Kenya piss me off. They don’t represent Kenyans at large and they promote products for a mass who buy second hands cloth, not for style but, because they’re cheap. Billboards showing the latest four wheels drive to people trekking kilometers to work. Poor people don’t get the picture perfect cooked food, not even the aroma, a picture must do while the cost of maize goes up.
The advertised products are only for the rich to afford. Advertisements are for the cocky rich to make the poor drool.

“I am confident when my skin glows” Ok! But parents have more confidence when they have money to buy school books so Vaseline will do for the time being.
“Smart people read” Correction, looking at the ads, only light-skinned smart people read and the rest watch TV on non-existent sidewalks outside bars.

Not too many ads on AIDS prevention, the goodness of mosquito net, livestock belongs in pastures and not on roads and that albino are people too. Plenty billboards all over the place and few directional signs on roads and forget about working traffic light they’re for decoration only.

Do you know where the money collected from these humongous billboards goes?
Your guess is as good as mine and you’re probably right.
Hush! Don’t say anything; in Kenya you can’t kiss-and-tell, but steal a chicken and you go to jail.
Steal big money then, at the least, the reward is a reshuffling from a fat-cat post after a small vacation giving time to complain about all the malicious people wanting to spoil a good name or a political (sorry) career.
The reward, besides going scot-free, is the big money awarded for libel suit.



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