I like Coluche, a French comedian, actor and political activist whose irreverence match my ideal of what a person should be and express.  He died in the prime of his life on 19 June 1986, age 41, from a motorcycle accident. 

Coluche besides being a comedian cared for people.  He is the founder of the “Restos du Coeur” (Restaurants of the Heart) whose organization mainly provides food and small amenities to the needy and the homeless.  Also, he was very political, the ranting type of politic which all of us understand looking at the paradox of our world. 

Some of his quotes are impossible to translate in English.  However, here are a few to put a smile or make you go hmmmmmm!

  • France has the best French politicians in the world!
  • A neutral country is the one which does not sell weapons to a country at war… unless it pays cash.
  • February is the month of the year when politicians say the least stupidity because there is only 28 days.
  • Dictatorship is “shut your mouth”.  Democracy is “keep on talking”.
  • If one day you feel useless and depressed, remember that one day you were the fastest spermatozoon of all.
  • It seems that a preservative is a nice political logo.  It balances inflation, allows expansion, limits overproduction and provides a satisfactory feeling of security.
  • I will admirably caution politicians who take me for a joker that I am not the one who started.
  • Do you know how, in South Africa, we call a black man with a machine gun?
    We call him sir.
  • At end month, the last 30 days are the hardest
  • Everyone has ideas.  The proof is that some are very bad.
  • Some look honest, but when they shake your hand you better count your fingers.
  • Some are tall, some are short! The good height for the legs, is when your feet firmly touch the ground!
  • If you listen to what peopel say: the rich are bad and the poor nice.  Then why is it that everyone wants to be bad.
  • You have a new washing powder, the same brand, which washes whiter that the one that already washed whiter. 
    Consequently, I am afraid to switch washing powder, I am afraid for my cloth to become see through.
  • I have a friend who married for love
    He married a rich woman… he loves money.
  • Artichokes are the real dish of the poor. It is the only dish that when you finish eating, you have more on your plate than when you started.
  • The day shit is worth as much as gold.  The poor will be born without anus.
  • Another advice: Do not drink while driving: you could spill your drink
  • The Russians , on their t-shirt, write CCCP instead of USSR.  The Mexicans thought it was for CouCourouCoucou Paloma !
  • God is like sugar in hot milk.  He is everywhere but you do not see him. The more you look for him the less you find of him.
  • God said  we must share:  The rich will have the food and the poor will have the appetite
  • Politicians invest money in prisons and not in schools, because for  sure they will not go back to school.
  • Gays do not reproduce and yet there are more of them.
  • Bigamy is when you have two wives and monotony is when you have only one.
  • Ladies, an advice: if you are looking for a man who is handsome, rich and intelligent … take three!
  • Long term credit means the less you can pay the more you pay.
  • With prefab house, during all your years of credit you fix what collapse.  After 15 years the ruins belong to you.
  • It is not really my fault if some people are hungry, but it would be my fault if nothing changed
  • It makes people laugh when you poke fun at politic.  However, it is mainly politic who poke fun at us.
  • If their was a tax on stupidity the government will self-finance.
  • It seems that God said their will be tall and short men
    Handsome and ugly men
    White and black men
    All will be equal but that’s not going to be easy.

I trust that my friend Lars will like some of these quotes.



One response to “COLUCHE

  1. Hey Pat,
    You got a collections of real interesting stuff here….
    You are an inspiration to a beginner like me…
    You were among the first to check out my blog and leave comments that encouraged and even challenged me to keep blogging.
    Thanks lots.

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